Some drinks try to sell themselves with mountain springs, untouched forests and images of pristine Nordic nature. PISS takes a slightly different approach: it puts the word PISS in enormous letters across the can and asks whether you are thirsty. Somehow, that approach works surprisingly well.
Despite the name, PISS is exactly what it claims to be underneath the deliberately ridiculous branding: sparkling water. It comes in a 440 ml can, it is strongly carbonated, alcohol-free and made in Estonia. At Heldeke, you can buy a single can or go all in with a 12-pack.
When the Packaging Becomes the Product
Sparkling water is not exactly an easy product to make exciting. At the end of the day, it is water with bubbles, and there are only so many ways to describe that before you start talking about mountain minerals and ancient glaciers. PISS avoids that problem completely by making the branding itself the main attraction.
The design is simple, bold and difficult to ignore. Put an ordinary silver can of sparkling water on a shelf and it can disappear among dozens of similar products. Put PISS on the front in huge letters and suddenly people are taking photos of it, sending it to friends and clicking links just to find out whether the product is actually real.
That is probably one reason PISS has also been rather good at bringing people to the Heldeke website. Curiosity is a powerful marketing tool, and very few product names create curiosity quite this efficiently.
And Then There Is Skinny PISS
Naturally, Heldeke has also found a way to improve upon the scientific achievement of carbonated water. Add ice, lime and a little vodka and you get the appropriately named SKINNY PISS.
It is a simple, refreshing drink, but more importantly it gives you the opportunity to ask somebody whether they would like their PISS straight or with vodka. There are not many cocktails that provide that kind of conversational value.
If you prefer the sober version, the original works perfectly well cold on its own. The carbonation is strong enough to give it some character without pretending that water needs to be anything more complicated than water.
Why PISS Works
There is actually a useful lesson hiding underneath the joke. A product does not only need to be good; it also needs to be remembered. PISS understands that very well.
The name is crude, simple and impossible to overlook. More importantly, it gives people a reason to talk about a product that would otherwise be extremely ordinary. Nobody normally sends a friend a photo of a can of sparkling water, but people absolutely send each other photos of something called PISS.
That is effective branding in its simplest form. You notice it, you remember it and, apparently, you occasionally end up on the Heldeke website because of it.
Get Your PISS at Heldeke
To be fair, Heldeke is probably exactly the sort of place where a product like this should live. Between theatre, comedy, strange performances, sauna, drinks and the general atmosphere of organised chaos, a sparkling water called PISS does not feel particularly out of place.
You can find PISS Sparkling Water in the Heldeke Bottle Shop as a single can or a 12-pack. Come for the comedy, stay for the theatre, and make sure you remain properly hydrated while making questionable decisions.
